Just Imagine :
You’ve just arrived to your workstation which you share with a colleague, and it looks as if it’s going to be another frustrating day.
Your side of the office is neat as a pin and incredibly well organized. You take care not to talk loudly when you’re on the phone, so that you don’t disturb your office mate.
Your colleague, however, is the exact opposite. Empty cups and crushed biscuits wrappers litter his side of the office. He sometimes puts the music on while he’s working, which breaks your concentration. And hell breaks when he is chit chatting with others while you are on call. Stationary items at your side of office are often misplaced, at times you dread yourself coming into the office every day, simply because you don’t like sharing your space with your colleague. He drives you crazy, and you often argue.
Can you recognize that there’s conflict between you two because the two of you have completely different working styles.
Let us try to understand this..
What’s Conflict?
It’s the difference of opinion with two or more people, real or perceived that is not resolved, worst if someone is getting aggressive.
All of us experience one or the other conflicts at work, personal life and even in Toastmasters. Members can have disagreements over programming, logistics, meeting styles and people.
Conflict is not always bad. When it is addressed and resolved, conflict often leads to positive changes, increased productivity, better decisions, innovation and bonding among people. Adversely, unresolved conflict can lead to poor productivity, low morale, distrust, and failure.
A leader must know how to handle conflict. He/ She can choose to ignore it, complain about it, blame someone for it, or try to deal with it through hints and suggestions; or can be direct, clarify what is going on, and attempt to reach a resolution through common techniques like negotiation or compromise.
Conflict Resolution
Conflict resolution is what we do to identify and address conflict in a mature and respectful way.
Why there are conflicts?
Root cause of all conflict and complaints – unmet expectations. Unmet Expectations from others!
Lets us take a closer look when and where conflicts occur.
a) Conflicting resources
ð We all need access to certain resources – office supplies, meeting rooms, scheduling conference calls via desk phones. There are n no of employees and limited resources , hence their needs can be at odds.
b) Conflicting Styles
ð Everyone works differently according to his/her individual need and personality. For instance some people love the thrill of getting things done at the last minute, while others need the structure of strict deadlines to perform. Whenever there is a difference in working style it may call a conflict.
c) Conflicting Perception
All of us see the world through our own lens, and difference in perceptions of events cause conflict. For instance HR Work from Home policy. There will be employees happy with such a policy being strictly followed, whereas there may be few who are not that pleased. Their perception – why it bothers so much to HR when by any means the work is done. Office politics comes in this section.
d) Conflicting Goals.
Sometimes we have conflicting goals in our work. We all work on projects which involve multiple stakeholders. One of them may ensure the high quality service is top priority but another stakeholder may focus on regular project updates and statistics. It’s sometimes quite difficult to reconcile the two!
e) Conflicting Pressures
We often have to depend on our colleagues to get our work done. However, what happens when you need a report from your colleague by noon, and he’s already preparing a different report for someone else by that same deadline?
f). Different Personal Values
ð Imagine that your boss has just asked you to perform a task that conflicts with your ethical standards. Do you do as your boss asks, or do you refuse? If you refuse, will you lose your boss’s trust, or even your job? I hope this won’t be case with anyone here.
g) Misunderstandings
When rules and policies change at work and you don’t communicate that change clearly to your team, confusion and conflict can occur. Lack of or incomplete communication can lead to misunderstandings.
Cost to individual
No points for guessing, conflicts are generally destructive in nature, with time, emotional and health costs. Conflicts with others results in stress, loss of confidence, unhappiness, hostility, withdrawal and even illness.
Cost to the organization
Research indicates that a typical manager loses 25% of the day responding to helpful conflict. This is time lost to creative, productive work.
Take a medium sized organization with 100 managers. Let’s assume average monthly salary per manager is Rs 80,000. With managers losing 25% of their time on conflict, the cost will be Rs20, 00,000
This only accounts for management time. The true cost will include higher employee time, higher staff turnover, missed opportunities, absenteeism, inefficiency, low morale and poor teamwork.
How to resolve conflict
So how do you deal with conflict and complaints?
Do you become aggressive back when it becomes a matter of who “wins” or “loses” the argument?
Or do you use cunning and well thought through communication and interpersonal skills to get you through the other end with the outcome that you desired?
In any case if a conflict has taken place, being a leader you have to approach it.
Method 1 : Ignore it.
In some situations, the issue may not be important and it may be best to ignore it. Often, though, this method does not work. The conflict does not go away.
It festers.
Method 2. Smooth it over.
This method is appropriate when the issues are more important to the parties involved than they are to you and the team’s goals. This method preserves harmony and goodwill.
It heals.
Method 3 Force.
A leader uses power to resolve differences. This method is best used when an emergency requires a quick decision. However, it usually results in “winners” and “losers,” and losers can be resentful.
It wounds.
Method 4. Compromise.
Each party makes a major concession to arrive at a solution. Since both parties lose something, they may have less support for the compromise solution.
It either unites or divides.
Method 5. Collaboration.
This is a good way to resolve conflict. Each side recognizes the other’s needs as legitimate and important and acknowledges their ability and expertise. They work together to arrive at an agreement that will resolve the conflict. When each party wins, they have greater commitment to the solution and no resentment or distrust
It spreads harmony.
Collaboration offers a framework that will result in a win-win situation. You can facilitate the collaboration process by following these seven steps:
- Find the root cause.
Once the issues have been determined, focus on solutions not blames.
- Allow all parties to speak
3. Encourage all parties to listen.
4. Identify areas of disagreement..
5. Identify areas of agreement. Once everyone has spoken, help them find and discuss areas they agree on, such as: Common goals, Interests and values
6. Search for solutions. Everyone
7. Reach a consensus, by, THE BRAINSTORMING METHOD
All ideas are written down as they are generated, without discussion or evaluation.
After the ideas are exhausted, team members return to the first item on the list and discuss it, evaluating its positive and negative aspects.
Eventually, the list is narrowed to the idea that best resolves the problem
Conflict Resolution
Conflict resolution is what we do to identify and address conflict in a mature and respectful way.
When it is handled well it can lead to
- Improved relationships between those who were in conflict
- Increased understanding for the different parties around a situation or topic
- The identification and hopefully, the improvement of the processes that aren’t working
If conflict is not handled well.
if it is allowed to escalate , relationships , the team’s ability to function, the workplace , and the product or service produced will all suffer. So understanding how to handle conflict is vital to ensuring that you can be as effective as possible in the workplace.
Somebody told me, leadership is not just about managing people it’s more about managing people’s ego.
This article was actually my speech as one of the projects required for ALB (Advance Leader Bronze) Certification by Toastmasters.
Stay Calm and Blessed,
Saakshi
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Saakshi Nagpal 